HAWKE

[foreverphantom]

shitpost tbd

Comments

[foreverphantom]

[ quietly: ] I don't deserve a cookie.

[nonmagicuser]

[ buddy...... ]

Come now... Cookies are good for all things including when you get mercilessly destroyed.

[foreverphantom]

Those who get mercilessly destroyed don't get cookies. They get killed.

[nonmagicuser]

I suppose I'll just have to eat this cookie for you then. Shame I've got two of them.

[foreverphantom]

[ sloooowly rolls over so that now the depression ball is facing hawke

he holds out a hand for the cookie ]

[nonmagicuser]

[ now you can see his humor in full hd ]

There we go. That wasn't too hard was it?

[ at least he wasn't lying about the cookie. mmm soft and still a little warm directly from the cafe.


they just also happen to be chocolate chip paw prints ]

[foreverphantom]

[ he neither notices nor cares about any of the cookie's qualities because he is immediately overturning his hand and mashing it into the dirt ]

[nonmagicuser]

[ me cookie......... ]

Well, at least you didn't throw it right back at me.

[foreverphantom]

[ rolls back over to continue sulking ]

[nonmagicuser]

[ sulkily: ] I would've enjoyed a misery cookie.

Do you want to talk about it instead?

[foreverphantom]

What is there to talk about? [ he thinks that whole display said plenty ]

[nonmagicuser]

Apparently talking about these things help. Haven't the slightest what they could possibly mean so I suppose you could just tell me about what you think about [ thinking...... thinking......... ] dogs instead.

[foreverphantom]

I like kicking them.

...Liked. I'm probably too weak to effectively kick one now.

[nonmagicuser]

[nonmagicuser]

[ WE ALL KNOW DAN ISN'T OKAY BUT LIKE

IS HE OKAY



hawke wheezes a bit of a cough and very quietly: ]

I suppose at least it's not ripping their hearts out to feel joy

[foreverphantom]

No, I saved that for humans.

...not anymore, though. [ too weak and pathetic to rip anyone's heart out now 8C ]

[nonmagicuser]

[ WHY ARE YOU JUST A SMALL FERAL FENRIS ]

And you light fires to feel joy too undoubtedly.

[foreverphantom]

[ so, so morosely: ] I didn't have to. I had fire on me at all times.

Not that it matters anymore.

[nonmagicuser]

[tiredly ] Of course you did.

And now you're simply a peasant like the rest of us plebeians. Sounds like someone out there has a sense of humour.

[foreverphantom]

Great. My suffering is your entertainment. Good to know.

[nonmagicuser]

It's a nice change from being the entertainment. Maybe you should do a flip.

[foreverphantom]

With what skill? In case you haven't noticed, I'm a weak, frail, pathetic noodle!

[nonmagicuser]

Well, there's nothing stopping you from learning a new skill while you're here.

[foreverphantom]

I am not learning to do flips.

[nonmagicuser]

[ raises his eyebrows at dan's sulking form ]

I'm not hearing better suggestions.