JIAOQIU

[foreverphantom]

shitpost tbd

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[foreverphantom]

...not since before I was me.

[fried]

[ buddy... that makes him sad. ]

Mm. I suspected as much. [ ... ] Would you like to try to make some? As this you.

[foreverphantom]

...how?

[fried]

[ he thinks about that, hands folded behind his back. ]

I think that it is important to figure out who you are first. And then you can move from there.

[foreverphantom]

[ scoffs ]

Yeah, like that's a feasible starting point.

[fried]

It is. Knowing who you are makes finding purpose and fulfillment easier.

Can you describe yourself to me using any other word than violent?

[foreverphantom]

[ oh this is horrible

this is the hardest homework he's ever been given and that's including the time he stole test answers and it ended up killing everyone he ever loved ]

...unyielding.

...desolate.

[fried]

[ GOD. god. okay. ]

... That's a start. [ he says, gently. ] You're strong. And you are persistent, even when you feel empty.

[ better words, or at least, trying to be better words. ]

But there's always a balance to these things. And sometimes, the scale tips too far in either direction. There is nothing wrong with that. It's how being alive works.

[foreverphantom]

[ scoffs at being called "strong." as if. ]

And?

[fried]

And my words are lost on you, for the most part, but I hope that eventually, they won't be. I won't tire of saying them. I like the sound of my own voice.

[foreverphantom]

[ rolls his eyes because yeah, i bet you fuckin do, but ]

...if there's supposed to be a "balance" and I'm out of it, then how am I supposed to fix it?

[fried]

[ he is pleased that he uses his words! ]

Well. You have to decide. Do you want to be unyielding? Do you want to be desolate?

[foreverphantom]

[ is this even a real question ]

[fried]

[ looks AT him continue to use your words ]

[foreverphantom]

[ sighs distastefully ]

Unyielding, obviously unyielding!

[fried]

You'll have to be a little less of that in order to be happy, I think. Being able to bend is important.

But - that is a path. You don't want to be desolate. So you'll need to do things that counteract it. Have you found someone you want to copy yet?

[foreverphantom]

...not entirely, no.

[fried]

Not entirely?

[foreverphantom]

There are...aspects of different people I want to take from...but no one as a whole.

[fried]

That works as well. You can put together a person from different aspects.

Will you tell me which ones?

[foreverphantom]

...Marcoh.

[ he does not want to offer up any of the other ones, though. ]

[fried]

[ is it because jiaoqiu is one of them (no) ]

Marcoh is a fine person to model after. Though I do hope it isn't just because he's strong.

[foreverphantom]

...it's part of it.

[fried]

And what's the other part?

[foreverphantom]

...he's stubborn. And straightforward.

[ he makes a face like he's eaten something disgusting--complimenting ppl is horrible ]