[ his ear flicks. and after a moment, his tail comes up and flops over danstone's waist, like a weighted blanket. if he puts it anywhere near his mouth jiaoqiu will pull it away, but for now it stays. ]
I understand what it's like to be tired. [ he says, and his voice is a touch more gentle. ] I also have thought that it would be better to have stayed dead.
But we are not. And for now, we can't change that. For now, we are here, and we are breathing, and there is still yet something.
I cannot fix your timeline or your body, and nor can I replace your family, but I can remind you that strength is not only found in how well you can throw a punch. If you'd like to find purpose somewhere, I am willing to help you.
You can give up, too. I won't stop you. You deserve the choice. It belongs to you and you alone.
Before, when I was alive, I was a healer on the battlefield. I spent every day of my life bandaging wounds, easing fevers, setting broken bones - all for those who would, the second they recovered, get back up and go out to do it all over again. After years of watching good soldiers throw away my efforts to keep them alive, I quit.
What, I asked, was the purpose of a healer, if those I healed refused to hold onto life?
[ a pause. ]
Years later, a former master of mine came to tell me that a General needed my help. And over time, her purpose became my purpose.
[ a sigh, here. ]
My suggestion, Brimstone, is to see what gives others their drive to live. If you cannot find something yourself, copy someone else's work until you find what works.
[ that's fair i feel like you'd have to torture that information out of most people ]
Those are all very dedicated people. You can ask them what gave them purpose in life. But - if that's too difficult, or you'd prefer not to, just observe them. See what brings them joy, and then try it for yourself.
You don't need to do it in front of them if it makes you feel like a numbskull.
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I understand what it's like to be tired. [ he says, and his voice is a touch more gentle. ] I also have thought that it would be better to have stayed dead.
But we are not. And for now, we can't change that. For now, we are here, and we are breathing, and there is still yet something.
I cannot fix your timeline or your body, and nor can I replace your family, but I can remind you that strength is not only found in how well you can throw a punch. If you'd like to find purpose somewhere, I am willing to help you.
You can give up, too. I won't stop you. You deserve the choice. It belongs to you and you alone.
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glances over his shoulder again. it's a long considering moment where he's silent. ]
...how? To get all those things. [ strength and purpose. ]
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You must promise not to scoff if I tell you. Give my suggestions a chance before you brush them off as weak or pathetic, hm?
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muffled: ]
Fine.
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Before, when I was alive, I was a healer on the battlefield. I spent every day of my life bandaging wounds, easing fevers, setting broken bones - all for those who would, the second they recovered, get back up and go out to do it all over again. After years of watching good soldiers throw away my efforts to keep them alive, I quit.
What, I asked, was the purpose of a healer, if those I healed refused to hold onto life?
[ a pause. ]
Years later, a former master of mine came to tell me that a General needed my help. And over time, her purpose became my purpose.
[ a sigh, here. ]
My suggestion, Brimstone, is to see what gives others their drive to live. If you cannot find something yourself, copy someone else's work until you find what works.
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...and how do you do that? [ find out what drives other people and adopt their motivations as his own ]
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Well, you'll need to try to get along with the others. [ wryly. ] Which means not throwing punches or causing scenes.
For now, are there any people here that you don't despise?
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Charlie. Marcoh. Waner.
[ perhaps even jiaoqiu. but you'd have to torture that out of him. ]
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Those are all very dedicated people. You can ask them what gave them purpose in life. But - if that's too difficult, or you'd prefer not to, just observe them. See what brings them joy, and then try it for yourself.
You don't need to do it in front of them if it makes you feel like a numbskull.
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the thought that he could actually do something to improve himself is terrifying though.
he's silent for a few moments before he eventually grunts. the grunt is supposed to mean "okay." ]
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Good. Would you keep me updated? I'd like to hear about what you try, if you do.
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Use your words.
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Have you tried any sorts of cheeses?
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...no. Not since becoming human again.
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Hm, then... perhaps you'll like that, or grilled cheese? That is essentially toast, which can be quite dry and bland.
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[ this is actually canon. although most fans like to exaggerate it to a violent hatred and even trauma. around toast. ]
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Of course. [ NOT THE TOAST TRAUMA it's fine jiaoqiu didn't think it was going to be that easy. ]
I doubt you'd like pasta...
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Hmm... let me continue to think on it. I'll find something. [ thwaps him with his tail again. ] So picky.
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