[Sigrun slashes with the kitchen knife. Certainly not nearly as sharp as a military dagger meant for troll killing, it even snags in the fabric. There's Sigrun, struggling to keep the rip going]
...you know what I think it's working better. [If anything it's distracting her more]
Thanks. You didn't have to go out of your way for this.
[She appreciates Danny's attempt]
At this point I just need something to do. This all is... [Exhausting. Trials are exhausting]
I try to be the one to look out for others, not be the one looked out for. I try not to need any kind of consolation. [Part of the reason why she even hid injuries from the medic in her crew, even though it needed urgent attention] But right now...I'm really worried.
That despite everything I have tried to do a bunch of you are gonna think I went and killed Satan, and in such a painful way. You treating me a little like normal and doing this feels like reassurance it's gonna be alright. That I'm not gonna be seen like some killer who got away with things.
[.......]
Why am I telling you this.
[Feels odd to have said this to one of the teenagers in town. Sigrun must have been seriously worried]
...well, the green girl in my crew-- [Jolyne] --pretty much went right to me as soon as we left the place and asked if I had killed him.
[Even though Jolyne reassured her she hadn't voted for Sigrun...it still feel bitter that one of the people who trust Sigrun the most -- and who Sigrun greatly esteems, too -- had come and asked her directly if she had done it. What are those who don't trust her as much going to think, then]
I know why she did it but at the same time I kinda wish she hadn't felt like she had to ask.
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[Sigrun slashes with the kitchen knife. Certainly not nearly as sharp as a military dagger meant for troll killing, it even snags in the fabric. There's Sigrun, struggling to keep the rip going]
...you know what I think it's working better. [If anything it's distracting her more]
Thanks. You didn't have to go out of your way for this.
[She appreciates Danny's attempt]
At this point I just need something to do. This all is... [Exhausting. Trials are exhausting]
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[She shakes her head]
It's having bothered to do that in the first place. You'd be surprised how many wouldn't do even that much.
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[ absolutely BAFFLED ]
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[She gives up from having to get the knife unstuck from the fabric]
It just felt like something. And something is better for me than nothing at this point.
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That despite everything I have tried to do a bunch of you are gonna think I went and killed Satan, and in such a painful way. You treating me a little like normal and doing this feels like reassurance it's gonna be alright. That I'm not gonna be seen like some killer who got away with things.
[.......]
Why am I telling you this.
[Feels odd to have said this to one of the teenagers in town. Sigrun must have been seriously worried]
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Nah, it's probably a Wonderball.
...is everyone else treating you like you really did kill Satan?
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[Even though Jolyne reassured her she hadn't voted for Sigrun...it still feel bitter that one of the people who trust Sigrun the most -- and who Sigrun greatly esteems, too -- had come and asked her directly if she had done it. What are those who don't trust her as much going to think, then]
I know why she did it but at the same time I kinda wish she hadn't felt like she had to ask.
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[Which, hey, she's proud of Jolyne, but still...]
Don't tell anyone I told you that, by the way. It'd make its way back to her and I don't wanna her feeling bad about asking me that.
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